#8 – Coaching Aliénor: How to overcome Job Loss?

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Transcription of the episode

EPISODE TEASER

“They do make redundancy plans, and sometimes, while you choose, tough luck—it’s you. And then you have to move on. That’s my problem: I understand that, yes, tough luck, you have to move on. It has nothing to do with you. In reality, I struggle to move on. I still think, Okay, why me? Why not somebody else? What did I do wrong? And what was the reason they chose me and not another employee in my team?“

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EPISODE SUMMARY

This episode will speak to you if you are employed and have experienced a situation where you didn’t feel recognized by the company you worked for. Maybe something happened that made you doubt your own value and how good you are as an employee. To give you a concrete example, in this episode, it’s Aliénor who is going to share her recent professional setback.

She’s not the only one, especially in the post-pandemic context, with the economy not doing so well. Many of my clients, and people in general, are facing layoffs. How do you deal with that when you’ve been working for a company for many years and suddenly, you’re let go? What happens to your self-worth? How do you move on from an experience that felt unfair and is hard to understand?
It’s a really challenging situation. I know that Aliénor is not the only one. I hope you can find some comfort and solutions. You’ll see how, throughout this episode, I work with Aliénor to help her reconnect with her gifts and process her emotions so she can truly digest what has happened—not just intellectually, but emotionally as well.

TRANSCRIPT: Live Coaching Session to move forward after a redundancy plan

Gloria
What’s the topic you’d like support on?

Aliénor
Thank you, Gloria, for this time. I had been with the company for 18 years. Last year, there was a massive redundancy plan because the company wasn’t doing as well as I thought. I was included in this redundancy plan, which meant that I had to leave—but I didn’t really choose to.

It was quite brutal. From the moment they told me I was on the list to the moment I left, only two weeks passed because they managed it very efficiently. They told me just two weeks before my holiday. In reality, I should have stayed for a month and a half, but because I had already planned one month of holiday, they notified me very late in the process.

So, after 18 years, I left within two weeks. The shock, the negotiations, not being able to say goodbye to most of my colleagues—it was all very difficult. The layoff was handled discreetly, and I wasn’t actually allowed to tell people I was leaving.

Even though I was told, You’re a very good performer. It has nothing to do with you, I still struggle with moving on. I understand that this is just how business works, how companies function. They make redundancy plans, and sometimes, you just happen to be the one affected. But that’s my problem: even though I understand it logically, I still struggle to move on. I keep asking myself, Why me? Why not somebody else? What did I do wrong? Why did they choose me instead of another employee in my team?

People tell me, It’s not that complicated; it’s just an Excel spreadsheet, and your name happened to be on it. Move on. But that’s exactly why I’m here. I know what to do—I know I have a lot to offer—but something is blocking me. I can’t seem to take the next step.

I’ve done my résumé, I’ve been training for interviews, but I haven’t done a single one yet. I’m scared. I’m afraid that if I go to an interview, they’ll realize I’m not actually that good. And that’s why I haven’t done it.

Gloria
I see.

Aliénor
That’s the introduction.

Gloria
Yeah, and as I listen to you, I can imagine how hard this has been and how deeply it has impacted you. On a rational level, you understand that it wasn’t personal—it was a business decision. But emotionally, it still hurts and affects your ability to take the next step.

When did this happen? How many months ago?

Aliénor
Last July.

Gloria
Okay, so about 8 to 10 months ago.

Aliénor
I managed to stay on the payroll until November, so officially, I left in November. But in reality, I went on holiday on July 15th, and that was it.

Gloria
Yeah. As you talk, I can feel it—your emotions, the weight of it. I don’t know if you’re someone who is connected to your body and sensations, but I can almost feel a tightness in my chest, like it’s hard to breathe. How does it feel in your body when you talk about it?

Aliénor
I think I was shaking a little. All my emotions came rushing back. My face feels red, and I can feel the heat. You mentioned breathing—I’m very bad at breathing. I always feel like I don’t get enough air in my body. And as I was talking to you, it came back. I thought I’d be able to talk about it without emotions surfacing, but the reality is, no—it still feels as fresh as if it happened yesterday.

Gloria
Yeah. And really, don’t judge yourself for that. We sometimes think that time alone will heal things, and while it can help, it’s not always enough. Sometimes, we need to revisit the experience a few times and really process what’s underneath the initial emotions.

What I see, at least with many of my client, is you try to move with your brain and think differently. But if you really want the situation to shift, and that’s what I will propose you to do now, is we need to go into the sensation and what is coming up for you through that experience. And then we are able to release and move on. We can’t minimize what has happened for you. Eighteen years! Did you like your job? Did you like what you were doing?

Aliénor
I did. It’s true that probably the last six months, I was wondering. I wasn’t that well. I was wondering I was going to be in the next step. But the reality is that I know now that my name had been put on the list eight months before. That explains why the last six months were a bit complicated because actually my manager knew he had put me on the list, but he hadn’t made it effective. Why? One part of me thinks it’s because I hadn’t finished my project and they wanted me to finish the project. But there was this sensation of there’s something wrong happening in the last six months. So yes, it was a surprise when I found out when he told me in July, but another time, I was like, Okay, that explains why for the past six months, our relationship has been very weird. Like one-to-ones cancelled, executive meetings that I was not able to attend with no particular reason. So did I like my job? I did. The year before, yes. I loved project I worked on. It was a very exciting project. It was a lot of new responsibilities. I really liked it. Last six months were a bit difficult.

Gloria

That part of the story. I can really see almost like you had all the sensation or the feeling like there is something happening there and not probably being able to put words on it. That shows also how sensitive you are and how much you sense things beyond just a busy day.

Aliénor

But I think I didn’t want to see the signals as well. I knew there’s something more within our head down, carry on your work, so fine. They had said there won’t be no redundancy plan in France, so I thought I was safe. Even though, as you say, there was something, not the way… Yes, I do feel things, yes, in the way people talk, the emails, Or don’t talk, actually.

Gloria

I want to emphasize it because it’s a gift you have and it’s important to grow the trust into that also for your next step. We’ll see in how it can help you. But having that connection to your intuition, to your senses, the feeling you have, and trusting that as a guidance also for you for the next step. Our body is often also smarter than those things before. So if I go back to what you shared, really, I’m connected to you, so I feel everything that’s around. And it’s suddenly like I feel all the emotions coming in around me. There are different ways we can approach this Now, you said, and I found it interesting, you said, Okay, I’ve started, and I also hear it from you, you are someone who goes into action. You are able to go into movement. But there is this block, and you said, once I go into an interview process, what are the fears that come up? You mentioned one, but I want to make sure we have everything and if you want to share all those.

Aliénor

I think the main fear is just one, is thinking that, yes, I’ve got a good resume, I did a lot of great stuff, but maybe I wasn’t that good. You know what I mean? Some years I perform well, you have bonuses and stuff like that, and people are happy with you. But the reality is, because I was put on that list, maybe what I was doing is just my job and I’m not exceptional. And that may be out there. There are people who actually are exceptional. And me, I’m just somebody, I’m just a project manager who delivers what I’m being asked to do. So it’s the fear that I’m not able to also explain exactly what I did because maybe I diminish what I did. I don’t know. And that people, I don’t say see-through, but maybe they will think that, Oh, I can have better than her.

Gloria

What would happen if you imagine, I know it’s a bit difficult, but just to see, imagine that’s what happened. People realize you are not that good. What does it create then for you?

Aliénor

First of all, I think in an interview that had happened, I think I would try to, not argue, but I know how I would react I would say, Actually, no, I did this and this. Fight back, try at least, saying, Okay, maybe they didn’t understand what I did, or maybe I wasn’t clear on the different steps or I don’t know, the achievements. I would try to fight back. Then if we really, Well, no, what you did something. Somebody who’s 25 years old, he can do it as well. Then I think, Wow, maybe I’m not a good project manager in the end. Maybe that’s not my choice. Maybe that’s not where I should go.

Gloria

It’s interesting because when I hear your voice saying, I would fight back, it means there are parts in you that do see your value. Can you tell me more if we connect to that side of you? What do you know you’re good at? Also, what do you enjoy doing? Where do you feel you are in the right place when you work?

Aliénor

The reason I really liked my last project is because I was given a target and that’s it, four stop on a blank sheet. You have to increase sales from this to this, four stop. I like the fact that, okay, so I’ll go and research, talk to lots of different people, sales, credit, finance, communication, whatever, do that, gather We’re doing the information piece and get people to write together. Together we find, okay, this is the strategy, this is a project we’re going to put together, and this is what we’re going to drive. I like both. I like the fact that you’re being charged of listening Finding to people, understanding the challenges, and finding the solutions. Maybe it sounds basic, I don’t know, but I like this element of going talk to one person, say, Okay, now talk to this person, talk to this person, no, Go on and on. Start with maybe two at the end of a second to 10. You’ve gathered a lot of knowledge. But actually, on another hand, this is something my manager said was saying, I was trying to understand too much the processes and the people as opposed to rely on the experience of the others.

I like to understand what I do. I like to understand when I’m working, I don’t like to miss one piece of the puzzle. I maybe go too much into details, but that’s the way I think I am. I need to be able to see the strategy to do to understand, at least at a high level, medium level, let’s say, the different elements, and I like this part of it. But the downside is that it could be doing too many things. Sometimes you’re waiting time, going the details, where somebody else could help you to find the details.

Gloria

I work a lot around finding your professional path, knowing more about your talents. Every quality we have can be a quality or a weakness, depending on how it’s used, what’s the environment, because there are some work that need people who are very detailed and other works who don’t need that. It’s not that in itself something is bad or good, it’s what’s the environment and do they seek that? And of course, we want to find an environment where they seek exactly people who are able to go deeper, who really know what they’re doing. So just to make you aware that there are always two facets to how we operate. And like exactly what you said, that’s making you feel safe, gathering the knowledge, understanding. And once you feel you have a broad enough perspective, then you feel you’re able to move. As you phrase it, it’s like trust, that’s how you operate, and that’s what you need. When you see and sense in your body, Maybe here’s the moment, I’m too much into detail now. I need to move, or I need… Then move with that. I can tell you, again, because I’m used to here and meet many different people, which is not your case.

That’s why I want to reflect that back is there are some people, if you give them a target and a blank sheet, and then they need to achieve that, they go into freeze state. They’re like, paralyzed. They’re like, Whoa, I’m not going to be able to meet the target, and they feel stressed, and that’s a too big challenge. What I hear when you share it, I’m like, there is an energy in you which is the, I want to achieve this. Oh, that’s a challenge. I just want I will reflect that back because no, not everyone. There are people who are going to recognize themselves in what you describe, but not everyone for sure. That’s, for example, if I can just imagine a company or a manager knowing, Okay, I can give It’s a target and she will find out how to reach it. She’s autonomous, she’s driven, and she will make it happen. That’s beautiful. I know I can rely on Alina.

Aliénor

Yeah. No, it’s true. You said that is something that people have a little bit told me, actually. I know when you give something to Alina, you know it will be done. If she can’t, she’ll just go and try 10 path. If the 11th one is the right one, then she’ll use it. I don’t give up.

Gloria

That’s amazing. Put yourself one second in the shoe of either a manager or a CEO. For example, a CEO can’t do everything and is relying on its team. If I know I have a person who is reliable, who knows what she’s doing, and I know she’s going to find a way, whatever way to achieve it, it’s in your mind. You can rest. You’re like, Okay, good.

Aliénor
No, you’re right. Thank you. Yeah. Yeah, because it’s normal for me, I don’t see that as something exceptional. I’m the same in a personal life, if I need something, it’s quite- You can’t imagine that sentence is the key sentence for everyone on their professional journey.

Gloria
But even for business owners, everything that is normal to you and is obvious, you don’t give it value. No. Yeah. Actually, it’s exactly what what you believe is normal and maybe easy for you that you need to give value because that’s where you are probably going to Excel even more. It’s part of your nature. That’s where we want to go, whether it’s in your next job, whether it’s if you would have a business. That’s where we want to put the focus and where you want to serve people.

Aliénor
Okay.

Gloria
Do you feel there is anything else you would add? Looking at your value, also thinking in terms of strengthening that part of you that knows you are good enough.

Aliénor
What are my key values, for example, you would say?

Gloria
Yeah, maybe I can rephrase it so it’s clear. The initial question was when you said, I’m going into an interview and then I’m like, Oh, they’re going to realize I’m not good enough, and we are going to work on the emotional part after. But right now, I just wanted to connect first to that side of you who knows I bring value to your project, I bring value in a company. You already shared me a very significant thing. Is there anything else, whether it’s how you collaborate, all the qualities you bring when you work?

Aliénor
From a soft skills side of things, I am quite good at building relationship. Not afraid to ask one person that I don’t know for information or go on like a spider network. I always find somebody, also I was in a company for 18 years, but I always managed whatever the question was to find somebody who knew somebody who would help me with the answer because I maintain this level of networking. I think I’m a nice person. I don’t know how to say that. I try to keep good relationship with people. Usually, if I help, people will help me, which is why I always had a really good network within my company, which has helped me a lot in all of my projects, actually. Because even the last one, I was asked to work on an area which is online, and I had to be part of the online team about 10 years before. But I still had this relationship within that team from 10 years ago. I think I’m quite good at that, at building relationship. When I have an idea, when I know where to go, I’m also good at making sure people come with me on that journey, making sure they understand what the journey is and let’s go together.

Aliénor
So motivation, I don’t know what it is. I’m not a sports coach, but I am good at creating this sensation of trust. It’s all about relationship when you think about it, on the human aspect of things.

Gloria
100%. Again, are you able to see the value of I bring someone in a team, I know the person is going to be able to work with everyone, is going to create connection, not be like just a solo worker, and we’ll be able to make everyone feel good and collaborate together.

Aliénor
Collaborate together.

Gloria
Like synergies, how many companies lose huge amount of money because people don’t work together. The information is not circulating. It’s a huge topic.

Aliénor
Yeah, it was in my company as well, I would say. But I try to, at least on the project team, to make sure it doesn’t happen. Yes, for me, the relationships are really key, and I try to make sure that they are good within a project group.

Gloria
Again, imagine either you are a project leader or you have a team. We all know that enjoying our work, depends, of course, on the task we do, on the project, but also on the relationships. If you come to work and you are stressed, or you don’t want to work with a person, or you don’t feel safe in your team, you don’t feel safe enough to speak, it’s a very different experience than coming to work and, Hey, how are you? Having a chit-chat and being happy and just enjoying working on a daily basis.

Aliénor
I’ve always been remote, so it’s always been done on calls because I was part of a big company and my Management was in Ireland and the project team was in lots of different countries. All of that, everything I’m talking about is always remote. It’s not a coffee machine. Hey, how are you? How was your weekend? But I always try the start of a call that we do have a little bit of this coffee machine conversation, not 10 minutes, because then you’ve got people getting impatient. But I think it is important to have a little bit of breaking the ice at the start of a meeting.

Gloria
But imagine that, that you were able to bring your energy and build that network, not even being present in a room that I would say it enhances even more the quality because we know as businesses, it’s harder when people don’t meet on a daily basis. The relationship might be harder to maintain creating that space to exchange. That, again, really, as I say to you, and maybe you can also listen to it again later. It’s like integrating that in yourselves and bringing it in the interview for you. I wanted to add a question. Yes, and that’s the last one around that topic I want to ask. It’s what What do people who have worked with you said to you about how it was working with you?

Aliénor
I would say indeed, energy. You always come back. She’s full of energy. She understands what she talks about. When you have your yearly review Anyway, I’ve seen it written on my reviews a few times. Trust. Trust, you can rely on her. Driven. Yeah, I would say mainly. I’m sure there’s loads. These are the ones that comes to mind.

Gloria

Great. And for you, do these qualities feel like solid ground? Are you able to say, Okay, yes, it’s true—I bring a huge amount of energy. Yes, it’s true—I understand what I’m talking about. Yes, I know what I’m doing?

So now, if it’s fine for you, let’s shift more towards the emotional side. But first, how do you feel about everything you’ve shared so far—all the qualities you have? How does that feel for you?

Aliénor
I think it’s reassuring—maybe also because I haven’t done an interview yet, so I haven’t had the opportunity to talk about myself. I think it’s nice, and it feels good to hear someone say, actually, you’re not that bad. You have qualities. You can do something with your life. It feels good.

Gloria
I’m just reflecting back what you’ve said. It’s already there in your reality.

Great job connecting all of that.

Now, if we shift—and I know it’s a big shift—can you describe the emotions that come up when you think about, okay, they fired me? What did that experience imprint on you? Was it something like, oh, I probably wasn’t good enough to stay in the company? Or was there something else that was imprinted in your mind or heart through that experience?

Aliénor
The things that come up are anger and injustice.

And also, with anger, I still don’t understand. Maybe that’s why I’m stuck—because I’m trying to find the explanation. Whenever I think about it, I feel angry because I wonder, why did they treat me like this?

I stayed for 18 years. I never did anything wrong. Why?

That feeling of injustice and anger—that’s what keeps coming back.

Gloria
I wanted to talk about that because, as I heard you sharing your story at the very beginning, I felt that there’s still a part of your mind that is trying to figure out why.

And that’s so normal.

I can speak from my own experience and from working with my clients—when we don’t understand something, we keep seeking an answer. We think, if I can just understand it, then I can be at peace. Then I can move on.

It’s the same thing happening with your energy right now. It’s like, okay, I’m trying to move forward and prepare for interviews, but there’s still one part of you that’s stuck in that past story, asking why.

And when we try to answer why, one of the easiest explanations our mind finds is, well, then I must not have been good enough.

But that explanation is hurting you.

And at the same time, because we also connected earlier with that other part of you that fights back, that answer isn’t satisfying either. Because you’re still seeking, okay, there must be another explanation.

Aliénor
Even though rationally, I tell myself, don’t look for an explanation. There isn’t one. It’s just business. It’s just the economy. You were in the wrong place at the wrong time in an Excel spreadsheet. Full stop. Move on.

But emotionally, I can’t hear it. I can’t understand it. Yes, it’s logical. But inside me, no, it’s not logical. There must be something else.

Gloria
If you had an explanation, what would it give you? Imagine you had a clear answer—what would it change for you?

Aliénor
It would help me understand what I need to work on.

Nobody’s perfect, after all. And of course, there must be areas where I could improve. But if I knew, okay, this is what went wrong, then I could take that into my next job. I wouldn’t repeat the same mistakes.

Gloria
That’s really interesting—your answer.

Because now, I’m coming back to this: the company’s explanation was we had to do layoffs, we used an Excel spreadsheet, and this is how it was done.

And yet, that explanation doesn’t feel valid to you.

Aliénor
Yeah, it’s true. I don’t take that as a valid explanation.

Maybe I should, right? But I can’t accept it.

Also, because I’ve seen many rounds of redundancy in this company. This wasn’t the first time. And most of the time—not always, but often—you could see a pattern.

When people were put on the redundancy plan, you’d think, yeah, I get it. That person wasn’t great at this or that.

Not every time, but often enough.

For example, during the last redundancy plan, which was either just before or just after COVID, the people who were impacted in my broader team—when I say team, I mean the larger European team—when I saw the list, I thought, yeah, I saw that coming.

I knew that person didn’t get along with their manager. I knew that project had failed. It made sense.

And because I have that pattern in my mind, I think, there must be a reason people are thinking the same about me.

Even though many people were kind and sent me supportive messages, saying, why? What happened?—which was reassuring—it still doesn’t change the fact that in the past, when I saw other people being let go, I had my own ideas about why it happened to them.

And now, I feel like others must be thinking the same about me.

That’s why the explanation doesn’t sit well with me. I can’t accept it.

Gloria
That’s really interesting because, as you were saying that, I was thinking—since I’m on the outside and I’m not emotionally involved—I just got another piece of the puzzle.

Now I understand more.

That was a new detail for me.

Just to check—because maybe you’ve already done this—have you ever asked for more explanation?

Aliénor
There wasn’t really an opportunity, to be honest.

My manager told me on a Monday morning, and after that, I never spoke to him again.

Then you deal with HR. I spoke to HR. And that was it.

Gloria
Okay. So that’s the situation.

You did what you could.

And from what you’re saying, it sounds like there won’t be an opportunity to get more of an explanation than what you’ve already received.

Aliénor
Yeah.

Gloria
So what do you want to do with that?

Aliénor
I think I have to accept it.

That’s it. I don’t have answers to everything in life.

I need to stop having that little… how do you call it in your head?

Gloria
The hamster running?

Aliénor
Yeah. I need to accept it.

Maybe that’s exactly where I need to focus.

Gloria
This is really good—what’s coming up now.

What does accepting mean to you?

Now that you say okay, I accept it, what does that actually mean? What meaning do you give to that acceptance?

Aliénor
It means accepting that I won’t have an answer.

But as you said earlier, I do have good values, good experience, and something valuable to offer another company.

It also means accepting that nobody is perfect.

Maybe there was something I could have done better. But whatever it was, I can’t change it today.

What I can do is focus on what I do have to offer, focus on my experience, and focus on my strengths.

And moving forward, I can try to be more vigilant—listen more closely to the signals if there were any.

But yes—accept that I don’t need to have the answer.

Focus on the positive.

Gloria

That’s a beautiful learning. I think about all the people I’ve supported—you’ve been there for 18 years. You’ve given so much of your time, your energy, your passion, your brain. Of course, you would like to have recognition.

As you said, accepting it is a hard learning curve. To realize, oh, I gave so much, and this is how it ends?

Aliénor
Yes, that’s exactly it. How can it end so quickly?

Recognition… it’s funny. I’m surprised that after an hour, I haven’t said that word, because it is something I feel deeply inside me. I’m lacking that recognition. Yes, I feel that strongly inside me.

Gloria
And business is business. So the company wasn’t able to give you that recognition.

Can you first give it to yourself?

Hey, wow, I’ve done all of that. I’ve given that to the company. I’ve grown so much.

So first, recognizing it for yourself. That’s part of the work we did as preparation for your next interview. Recognizing—come on, look at what you did there.

You can also imagine, okay, if I hadn’t been in the company, what would have been different? What did my presence help create? What impact did I make in that company?

And also, can you allow yourself to acknowledge the recognition you received from your colleagues? Because that’s something I heard when you shared about how people reacted—saying, why are you leaving? They were so surprised.

Can you allow yourself to take in that recognition from the people you worked with?

Maybe the business wasn’t able to provide it, but can you let that human recognition from your colleagues reach your heart?

Aliénor
It actually feels good. Yeah, you’re right.

Because I can keep those moments. I’ve kept a few emails—not a lot—but maybe I should go back to those emails from July and read them again.

Gloria
You do have recognition in that case.

Aliénor
I was able to send a goodbye message because I really wanted to. I wanted everybody to know, by the way, I’m leaving.

That day, I was finally allowed to tell people.

It’s funny, you actually get emails from people you didn’t work that much with, or from people who were a bit further away. It’s really interesting to see the responses and the emails you get back.

Gloria
Yeah. So don’t devalue them.

When you mentioned it before, I thought, hey, don’t minimize that feedback.

Aliénor
But my problem is that I think, well, everybody gets that, don’t they?

I don’t know how different it is.

Gloria
Not necessarily.

If someone makes the effort to send an email, they could have just as easily chosen not to send it.

If they took the time, it means they care.

Aliénor
Yeah, true. That’s right.

Gloria
So they cared about you.

How do you feel now?

Aliénor
It’s funny—I feel tired.

No, happy! Don’t get me wrong.

Gloria
I know, I know. It’s because we’ve moved through a lot of emotions. That’s fine. It’s intense.

Aliénor
Yeah, but I feel like I’m leaving with something.

I’ve got keys—if that’s the right word.

But you’re right, the recognition part is important. Delegation, as you said, is something I need to work on.

I actually didn’t write much down, to be honest. I was more focused on the conversation.

Gloria
That’s fine. You can always listen to it later.

Aliénor
Yeah. But also, what we talked about—remembering the values.

What do you bring to your job? What do you contribute? What are your values? What is your experience?

Because for me, values are really important. Experience is one thing, but values are another.

What can I bring to my next employer?

That’s what I need to focus on.

I liked what you said—asking myself, if I hadn’t been there, what wouldn’t have happened?

Okay, maybe someone else would have done it, but would they have done it the same way?

Because one of my qualities, as I said, is that I really dig deep to find solutions, wherever they are.

For one of my online projects, it was a success because I searched everywhere for a solution and didn’t give up.

And maybe not everyone would have done it that way.

Or maybe, instead of doing three projects, another person would have done just one.

I don’t know.

Gloria
Yes, you were super dedicated.

Now, instead of trying to find one single answer, recognize that there are a few different pieces we’ve put together.

It’s okay.

And as you said, nobody’s perfect. We are all learning.

I believe that a good manager and a great company are those that help you grow.

You are not supposed to be perfect.

We all have our weaknesses. We all need support in certain areas.

The important thing is to acknowledge, okay, I can grow in this area, but not from a place of, oh, I’m not good enough.

Instead, it’s recognizing, I’m good at this, this, and this. And yes, here’s something I need to improve. But that’s normal—that’s human.

It doesn’t mean, oh, I didn’t do this perfectly, so I must not be a good manager.

No, it just means we all have things to improve on.

That’s only one part of the bigger picture.

Take a step back, breathe, and look at it.

It’s okay.

The company wasn’t doing well, and they made decisions.

You are allowed to feel angry and to think it wasn’t fair.

And honestly, I agree—it’s not fair.

At least, in my vision, this isn’t the ideal way a business should treat employees.

You learned the hard way.

But as you said, the real question now is, what have you learned?

And how do you take that learning with you?

Aliénor
I think protection is the big lesson. You mentioned that word earlier—protecting yourself. Yes, definitely.

That’s what I take from this experience.

I need to protect myself and not expect too much from people.

Or not expect to always get back everything I give.

So maybe, I need to give less.

I don’t know.

Or maybe, I just need to be smarter about it.

Gloria
Give in a way that feels right for you. How do you feel?

Aliénor
No, thank you.

I feel like, in one hour, we covered a lot.

You made me dig into areas that I probably didn’t want to think about.

So, thank you.

To be honest, I didn’t really know what to expect from this session.

I didn’t know if I had to prepare something, or if I needed to think about what to say in advance.

But it felt really natural.

No, really—thank you.

Gloria
You’re welcome.

And thank you for sharing and being so open.

Aliénor
I think that’s important, actually. If you learn from an experience and it helps you move forward, then it’s valuable.

Gloria
It will help many other people. I actually recorded another session with someone who was also in a difficult situation at work, navigating a new job (Click HERE to listen to the episode). It’s challenging. You’re not the only one facing this. If that can help you, it’s okay. Trust how you do things and ground yourself in what you are good at. I think that is the key.

Aliénor
I think, as we said earlier, it’s about forgetting the past and focusing on the positive—on what we can bring. That’s probably why interviews could actually be good. I know in my heart that it’s true—if you go to interviews and people are amazed by what you do, then you gain confidence and get back up.

Gloria
One hundred percent. Maybe not forgetting the past, but learning from it, as you said before. That’s how we grow as human beings.

Aliénor
It’s been a big learning curve.

I’ll just share a little anecdote. When I called my mom to tell her about the redundancy, she said, “Hallelujah! We’re opening champagne today.”

I was like, “What? I just got laid off.”

And she said, “Yes, but you’ve known for six months that you weren’t happy. I was just waiting for this to happen. Now you’re going to move on. You’re going to find a job you love, with people you like. Maybe you’ll train in something new. This is what you needed to get out.”

And I thought, okay, well… it took me some time to see it that way.

It’s about bouncing back and learning from the experience. It really has been a learning curve. I know people who are still in the company, and for them, it’s actually complicated and difficult. I have the chance to move on, to work for a company that might be closer to my values.

Gloria
One hundred percent. Everyone deserves to be in a place where they are valued, where people appreciate who they are and how they work, and where they enjoy their job.

CONCLUSION

How was this episode for you? I’m super curious—what have you learned? What are your takeaways? What will you focus on after listening to this session? And how does it help you move forward in your professional path?

There’s one thing I wanted to mention because, as Aliénor said, the things that are obvious to us—our natural talents—we tend to believe that everyone knows how to do them.

I remember that before I became a coach, I knew I was someone who could really listen well. But for me, I thought, “Listening? That’s a skill?” I completely undervalued it. I thought, “This is obvious. It doesn’t have any special meaning. How can I make something out of that?”

And now, listening is at the core of my work. I understand how powerful it is. I even remember making a post on social media about how transformative listening can be.

If you are truly able to deeply listen to someone—hear what they are not saying, create space for their feelings and thoughts—it enables them to move forward.

And that’s something I deeply believe—we all have the resources inside us. The question is, how can we connect to them so that we can help ourselves move forward?

I’m not here to tell you, “This is what you need to do.” I don’t have that answer. You are an adult, you know yourself. Even children know how to move forward—it’s just about helping them connect to their own inner resources.

So, what are the qualities that come naturally to you, the ones you assume everyone has? And how can you start integrating them as something valuable?

Maybe these are qualities you should appreciate more—whether for your current job, your next job, or even for your business. Because this is also extremely important for business owners—to recognize what they are good at and value it, so they can build offers around it and enjoy their work.

If you want to go deeper, I’ve created a free guide focused on understanding yourself professionally and helping you move through your next steps.

Click HERE to discover it. In that guide, I also talk about how we tend to underestimate the things that come naturally to us.

Because I hear this all the time in coaching sessions, especially when helping people with their professional paths.

If you feel ready to start this inner journey for yourself, to create a professional path where you feel valued and confident in the work you do, and where you are in the right environment, I’ll also share a link to my coaching offer for professional support.

In this program, we work through three main pillars.

The first pillar is always self-knowledge. This is the foundation. We dive deep into who you are, your strengths, what you enjoy doing, and what others see in you. We also do feedback work, so by the end of this pillar, you have a clear understanding of your talents and what truly fulfills you.

The second pillar is mindset and emotional work.

Because once you know yourself, obstacles can still appear. It’s like coming across a big river or a hole in the road—you don’t know how to get across. Often, these obstacles are emotional fears or limiting beliefs.

Just like what we heard in this episode—“I’m not good enough,” or “What if people realize I’m not as good as they think?”—these thoughts hold us back.

And that’s just one example. In coaching, we work through these emotions and unfold what’s really happening inside, so you can feel at peace, more confident, and ready to move forward.

The third pillar is action.

Coaching only works if you put things into action. This is when the real shift happens. After each session, we identify concrete steps that will bring real change in your life—not just internal reflection, but real, tangible progress.

If that resonates with you, if you feel like this makes sense and this is the work you want to do, you can check out the link for more details. You’ll also find testimonials from people I’ve worked with.

And lastly, I want to say—because I truly believe this—I am not the right coach for everyone.

Of course, if you’ve been listening to my podcast, if you resonate with my content, then I might be the right fit for you. But just to clarify how I work on professional paths—I am not the kind of coach who just looks at the job market and says, “Okay, these are the positions available, let’s fit you into one of them.”

It’s not that market analysis isn’t important, but for me, it’s the last step of the process.

Because what often happens is that people make career decisions based purely on logic—they think, “This makes sense, this is financially viable.” But then, they end up feeling unfulfilled and wondering, “Why am I not happy?”

It’s because they made a logical choice, without including their heart, soul, and real desires.

We need to take those into account first!

And then, once we’ve done that deep inner work, we look at how to make it a reality in the job market. To discover my coaching, click HERE. Until next time, keep exploring your Inner Space – where authenticity sets you free.