#2 – Coaching Antonin: How to value my (business) services to sell ?

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Transcription of the episode

EPISODE TEASER

Really, that’s the job we all have to do—getting out of our own way. Because if we, as business owners, focus on all our flaws and what we can’t do, then we’re just nurturing that space. Instead, if we return to the question: What am I able to do? What do I bring? and confirm that it responds to a need, we can focus on bringing that forward. There are people right now who need it.

Mentioned in the episode: 

– Get a Human Design Reading by clicking HERE.

– If you liked this episode, you will want to listen to Amy’s coaching session. It will be published in February 2025. Subscribe or join my newsletter, to make sure to catch the episode.

EPISODE SUMMARY

This episode is for you if you’re a business owner struggling with the idea and process of valuing your services, your offer, and the work you do. When we talk about value, we inevitably talk about money too—topics that are deeply connected. You might feel unsure about what you can actually sell to your clients, questioning if you see the value in your offer, if they see it, and whether it’s truly valuable. These questions are fundamental because if you aren’t aware of the value of what you’re offering, how can you sell it? And how can you help people understand why they need to buy your services?

Whether you’re at the beginning of your entrepreneurial journey or further along, this is a topic that comes up repeatedly. Clarifying your offer’s value has a direct impact on your income. If you’re unclear, it’s difficult to convey that value and make sales. Early in your business, especially if it’s your first time being an entrepreneur, this is one of the most challenging and critical things to address.

However, even later in your journey, valuing your new products, services, or ideas remains an ongoing challenge. It’s a continuous process for business owners: determining what your new creation is worth and how to communicate that in a way that resonates with your clients and feels authentic to you.

One key principle I emphasize is ensuring your business practices feel good in your body. If there’s an internal conflict or discomfort because someone told you “this is how it must be done to succeed,” it’s unlikely to work for you.

I recorded another episode with Amy about aligning your business practices, which was eye-opening for her and reflects my journey as well.

But today’s episode focuses on value, worth, money, and competition. At the very end, I’ll also share a perspective for those who feel stuck in competition with others offering similar services. If you find yourself thinking, “They’re better than me, so why even bother?” stay until the end. I hope you’ll find this episode enlightening.

TRANSCRIPT: ANTONIN’S COACHING SESSION

Gloria:
Antonin, I’d love to hear what brings you to this coaching session.

Antonin:
Yes, what brings me here is that I’m struggling in situations where I need to sell myself—whether in the context of competition, applying for jobs, or selling my services as an entrepreneur. When I know there are other people applying or offering something similar, I find it hard to highlight my worth or differentiate myself. I also feel conflicted about taking someone else’s spot. Even when I want to share the value of what I offer, I feel tension about putting myself forward.

Gloria:
How does it feel when you imagine being in such a situation? What sensations or thoughts come up?

Antonin:
I feel tension in my chest, and a lot of thoughts surface—subtle ones like, “I’m not worth it,” or “It’s not going to work.” There’s also a deeper feeling: if I succeed, someone else loses, and I don’t like that. I don’t want to win at someone else’s expense.

Gloria:
So, it seems like you almost prefer the other person to win, even if it means you lose?

Antonin:
Yeah, kind of. Sometimes I’m okay with winning, but I’d want it to feel balanced, like in a game where everyone has an equal amount of wins and losses. But in real life, it’s not just one person I’m playing with—it’s everyone. Right now, I’m applying for jobs, and it’s not working out. On the other side, I’m trying to create an offer for my services, but it’s unclear, and I struggle to communicate its value. It almost feels like bragging. In France, there’s this idea that you should be humble, and if you say how good you are or how great your product is, it’s frowned upon. I feel tension about this—like I can’t share what I’m good at or how my work can help people without coming across as arrogant.

Gloria:
That’s a really important point. And if some of your thoughts come in French, that’s fine—we can translate them. Many of the people I coach come from different cultures and languages. So, from what I hear, there are several layers: being clear about your value, owning that value, and overcoming the belief that owning it could negatively impact others. Is that right?

Antonin:
Yeah, exactly. That’s the hardest part. For example, I currently offer AcroYoga sessions focused on creating deep connections with oneself and others. But I know that if people come to me, they won’t go to other trainers. It feels like I’m adding to the market and creating competition with them.

Gloria:
So, competition becomes a trigger for you. When you see it as competition, it feels like stepping up and owning your value directly impacts others negatively?

Antonin:
Yes, exactly. When I sense competition, I just withdraw. It doesn’t motivate me at all. Instead of stepping forward, I pull back.

Gloria:
Alright. Let’s take it step by step. First, let’s clarify your value. Then, we’ll move to owning it and addressing the competition-related feelings. Let’s start with your offer. Can you share what you already know about the value you bring?

Antonin:
I think the main value I offer is that it helps people connect to a subtler dimension of reality—both within themselves and in their relationships. It’s about listening deeply to oneself and to others, fostering cooperative and consensual relationships, and meeting each other’s needs in a non-competitive way. For some people, this work opens them up to the possibility of vulnerability and safety in relationships, especially if they’ve felt closed off or stuck in a world of competition and darkness. My sessions create a space where people can experience a new way of being—both with themselves and others.

Gloria:
That’s beautifully put. And what feedback do you usually get from people after a session? How do they feel?

Antonin:
They often say they feel peaceful, connected to themselves and others, and calm. In the days that follow, they might feel more empowered to listen to themselves and act accordingly. For example, someone might feel more confident saying “no” at work to things they don’t want to do because of the clarity they gained during our session.

Gloria:
That’s powerful. Let’s go back to the beginning of the client journey. Before they engage with you, what problems or desires typically bring them to your sessions? What makes them decide to try AcroYoga with you?

Antonin:
So far, it’s mostly curiosity. They know me a little, and they find something interesting about what I’m offering, but I think they don’t fully grasp the value until they experience it. Even when I explain that it’s about creating deeper relationships and listening to oneself, they don’t really understand what that means until they’ve gone through it.

Gloria:
That’s completely normal. For clients who haven’t experienced something like this before, it can be hard to imagine its impact. Let me reframe the question: Imagine you had a client who didn’t know you personally. What kind of problems or challenges might they have that your sessions could help solve?

Antonin:
I think it could be for people who have never felt safe in relationships or who struggle to connect deeply with others. My sessions could help them explore being in a relationship in a safe, non-judgmental environment.

Gloria:
That’s an excellent insight. It seems like you’re offering a space for people to experience relationships in a way that feels safe and nurturing—something they may not have encountered before. Does that resonate?

Antonin:
Yes, it does. That’s a good way to describe it. I like that perspective.

Gloria:
Perfect. Now, let’s build on that. You mentioned earlier that people leave your sessions feeling empowered and at peace. By focusing on the specific problems they’re facing before they join—like feeling unsafe or disconnected in relationships—you can better communicate the value of your work. People might not immediately understand phrases like “deep connection” or “listening to oneself,” but they’ll resonate with tangible outcomes, like feeling safer and more confident in their relationships.

Gloria:
When clients see how your work addresses their specific challenges, they’ll begin to understand the value you bring. It’s not just about what happens during the session but how it transforms their lives afterward. So, let’s move to the next step: owning your value. How does it feel to claim that you provide these benefits for your clients?
Antonin: It’s a mix. On one hand, I feel joy and excitement—it feels good to recognize the value I bring. But on the other hand, there’s something holding me back. I keep hearing a voice in my head saying, “There are people who do this better than you.” That thought makes me shrink a little inside.

Gloria:
Thank you for sharing that so openly. I want to acknowledge the joy you feel—it’s wonderful that you’re connecting to the positive impact of your work. At the same time, let’s explore the shrinking sensation you described. What do you believe people need most from your services?
Antonin: I think people need a space where they can be fully themselves, connect deeply with themselves and others, and feel supported in a compassionate, non-judgmental way. They need patience, kindness, and acceptance for where they are, as well as encouragement to grow at their own pace.

Gloria:
And do you feel capable of providing that?

Antonin:
Yes, I do.

Gloria:
I’m sure of it too. Everything you’ve described shows how deeply you understand and care for your clients’ needs. It’s easy to compare ourselves to others and think, “They’re better than me.” But the real question isn’t about being “better.” It’s about whether you can meet your clients’ needs. Can you see the shift in perspective?

Antonin:
Yes, I like that. It’s not about me—it’s about serving my clients’ needs. That feels much more freeing.

Gloria:
Exactly. Our role as business owners is to focus on what we can offer and how it serves others. If we dwell on our flaws or compare ourselves to others, we block ourselves from showing up for the people who need us. But when we focus on what we bring to the table, we can move forward with confidence.

Antonin:
That’s really helpful. Thank you.

Gloria:
Let’s move to the last point: competition. Earlier, you mentioned feeling sad when you think about succeeding because it feels like it comes at the expense of others. How does that feel for you now?

Antonin:
I still feel some sadness. There’s this lingering belief that if I succeed, someone else will lose out. It reminds me of when I was a child, sharing food with my siblings. If I took more, they would have less. That sense of scarcity has stuck with me.

Gloria:
That makes sense, and it’s such a common experience. Growing up, we’re often taught that resources are limited—whether it’s food, attention, or opportunities. But let’s reframe this. Imagine that your success doesn’t take away from others. Instead, it creates more opportunities for everyone. For example, your work isn’t depleting a finite resource—it’s adding something new to the world. How does that feel?

Antonin:
That feels much better. When I think about it that way, I realize that my work doesn’t take anything away from others. If anything, it adds to the world in a positive way.

Gloria:
Exactly. Your work contributes to creating a better, more connected world. And by succeeding, you can even inspire or support others to do the same. It’s not about scarcity—it’s about abundance. Does that shift anything for you?

Antonin:
Yes, it does. I feel lighter. It’s like I can let go of the idea that my success harms others and focus on how it can benefit them instead.

Gloria:
That’s a beautiful realization. And as you step into this mindset, remember that your success not only serves your clients but also sets an example for others who may be struggling. You can show them that it’s possible to grow, thrive, and still contribute positively to the world.

Antonin:
Thank you. This has been so helpful. I feel much clearer about my value and the impact I can have.
Gloria: I’m so glad to hear that. You’ve done great work today. Keep connecting to the deeper purpose behind what you do, and let that guide you. And remember, your clients need exactly what you offer.

COACHING SESSION REFLECTIONS by Gloria

Did you enjoy this episode? Did you recognize yourself in the challenges he’s facing? You are not alone—it’s foundational work that we need to do at the beginning of our business. And, as I said in the introduction to this episode, we always need to revisit it. If I were you and you feel ready to do it on your own, you can work through the three steps I’ve outlined with Antonin: clarifying your value, owning it, and addressing competition.

If there’s one key question to ask, it’s this: What problem are my clients facing, and how can I communicate effectively about it? Often, as entrepreneurs, we end up talking about the methodology we use or using words that don’t really resonate with our clients. I’ve been there—I can still fall into that trap myself. So it’s not about succeeding once and declaring, “Now I’ve mastered it.” You might become highly skilled, but it’s always a work in progress. Be kind to yourself in the process.
I also wanted to add something I didn’t mention in the episode because it’s more my personal perspective, and I wanted to make space for Antonin’s transformation regarding competition.

After many years of running my own business, I’ve reached a stage where I feel I’m not in competition with anyone. You might say, “But Gloria, there are other coaches who share the same clients as you, who offer similar products and services.” Yes, that’s true. Some people will choose others over me—or the opposite. But I don’t feel like I’m competing with them. Why? Because there is only one Gloria, just as there is only one you. Each of us is unique.

What helps me to not feel in competition?

As you’ve already noticed, I’ve started to give the answer: it’s knowing my uniqueness. My self-knowledge has deepened and grown over the years. I’ve used specific tools to understand what I’m good at, what I enjoy, and what people want and need in their personal transformation journey (which is my field). Your field might be different.
I am deeply grounded in knowing my strengths and also what I’m not good at. I’m very clear with my clients—there are things I’ll tell them not to work with me on because it’s not in their best interest (or mine). For example, some things simply don’t excite me or align with my skills.

As you know, if you’ve been following this podcast, my passion lies in inner work. The podcast is called The Inner Space for a reason! For me, inner work is my zone of joy and talent. It’s about meeting yourself on a deep level, connecting with your feelings, shifting your mindset, and from that aligned space, moving into action. Inner work doesn’t erase fears or doubts, but it allows you to move forward with greater clarity.

There are, of course, other coaching approaches—more classical or grounded solely in external reality. I love incorporating energetic work and spiritual perspectives, while some coaches take a purely materialistic approach, focusing strictly on the here and now. That’s perfect too, because different people connect to different methods.
There is someone for everyone. When I say I’m not in competition, it’s because you’ve likely experienced working with various people and found that some resonate deeply with you. Hopefully, that’s the case with me as you listen to this. You might hear similar advice elsewhere, but something about how it’s presented here lands differently for you. That’s because each of us brings a specific energy, activating something unique in others.

As Antonin does for his clients, you do for yours. Trust that you are exactly the right person for some people. At the beginning of my coaching journey, I wanted to help everyone—I thought, “This work is amazing! Everyone needs it!” But over time, I realized that I can’t enable transformation for everyone, and that’s perfectly fine. Instead, I focus on those who truly connect with what I share and who are ready to do that kind of work. That’s where the magic happens.
So how do you avoid feeling competitive? Start by deepening your self-knowledge. This will grow your confidence, trust in yourself, and your drive to share your unique strengths, approaches, and vision. By doing so, you’ll naturally attract the right people. Adjust this idea to your field, whether it’s personal development or something entirely different—it applies universally.
If you need help on this journey, I highly recommend starting with a Human Design reading. I’ll include a link if you’re interested in exploring this further. Human Design, for me, is one of the quickest ways to connect with your body’s wisdom and embody more of who you are. It helps identify your specific strengths and lets go of the “shoulds” that don’t truly serve you. It’s a beautiful tool.

Thank you for joining The Inner Space. Make sure to subscribe, leave a comment, or share this episode with someone who might need this encouragement. Until next time, keep exploring your inner space—where authenticity sets you free!