Today, Caroline Desquest shares her vision of giftedness through the Gifted Interview. Thank you, Caroline! She is President of “Caro fait son marché” (“Caro does her market”) and is training to become a humanistic hypnosis practitioner, among other things ;-). She currently lives in Versailles, France.
.IF I COULD CHOOSE, WOULD I STILL BE GIFTED?
Without a moment’s hesitation, yes!
.WHAT (MY OWN) GIFTEDNESS MEANS TO ME
A particularly heightened sense of perception, both sensory and intellectual.
.IF I HAD TO CHOOSE AN IMAGE OR A KEYWORD THAT SUMS UP WHAT GIFTEDNESS MEANS
A 180° fan or a kaleidoscope
.HOW LONG HAVE I KNOWN ABOUT IT?
Since always unconsciously and my mother (psychologist) told me when I questioned my eldest son’s way of perceiving the world, I was 27 years old.
.WHAT PHASES HAVE I GONE THROUGH SINCE MY DISCOVERY?
The incomprehension that she didn’t tell me earlier because I always felt different from others. This would have allowed me to doubt myself less and to avoid over-adapting myself since childhood to obtain recognition.
Pride, so I did have “something more” than the others.
The fear that my children would go through the same afflictions as I did during their development.
Suffering from the incomprehension of those close to me, even their refusal to try to understand, their denial.
Curiosity, to go further and further in my research on the subject and this is still the case.
The acceptance of this state of being.
Finally, inner peace, making peace with myself first of all and with others as well.
.HOW DO I EXPLAIN IT TO SOMEONE WHO HAS NEVER HEARD OF IT?
I tell her that I have special talents, namely tree-like thinking which allows me to see all possible solutions related to a problem, and that I am hypersensitive to my sensory environment. One of my friends calls me “Caro les bons tuyaux” (“Caro the great tips”) …
.THE REMARK WHICH BLEW ME AWAY MOST WHEN I TALKED ABOUT IT
“Yes, well you’re not Einstein either! “
.HOW IT CHANGED MY LIFE (TO KNOW IT)
It changed everything radically. The light at the end of the tunnel has come on…
.WHAT I HAVE ALLOWED MYSELF TO DO EVER SINCE
To be myself and not to try to over-adapt myself all the time. Authenticity is my Ikigai.
NB from Gloria: Ikigai is a Japanese term, Iki = to live and Gai = worthwhile, it describes our reason for being.
.WHAT IT CREATES TO OTHERS WHEN I TALK ABOUT IT
Curiosity because I present it in a humorous way.
.WHAT IRRITATES ME WITH GIFTEDNESS
That people only put the intellectual aspect and academic knowledge forward, there are so many other facets to discover! I am a fervent follower of Howard Gardner’s multiple intelligences!
.WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO EMPHASIZE ABOUT GIFTEDNESS
The heterogeneous side! There are as many different gifted people as there are individuals. What a wealth of richness to discover.
.WHAT I PERSONALLY FIND TO BE THE MOST DIFFICULT
Slowing down my overactive imagination…
.WHAT I PERSONALLY LOVE
This overpowering creative side that adapts to art (or hobbies) as well as to life situations, my own or others.
.MY WELLBEING TOOL OR PRACTICE THAT HELPS ME MOST
Walking in the forest, being in nature, having the feeling of being part of a “whole”. I have a holistic view of life.
.A MISREPRESENTATION THAT I WANT TO CALL INTO QUESTION
A gifted person must succeed academically.
.WHAT I WANT TO SAY TO GIFTED PEOPLE
The greatest gift you can give yourself is to learn to appreciate yourself as you are. Go and meet yourself!
.WHAT I WANT TO SAY TO PEOPLE WHO ARE NOT CONCERNED
Be open to difference, normality does not exist. All human beings have different talents.
.WHAT I WOULD RECOMMEND TO SOMEONE WHO IS WONDERING
Be curious, cross-check the information gathered and take advice from professionals specialised in giftedness. Follow your intuition.
.THE MISTAKE NOT TO MAKE FOR A GIFTED PERSON
Thinking that giftedness is an end in itself.
.MY PROFESSIONAL ADVICE FOR GIFTED
Be careful not to exhaust yourself by multitasking, delegate and trust others, otherwise you will lose focus and forget what is essential, what really energizes you. Respect the speed of others as much as your own, be gentle.
.MY PERSONAL ADVICE FOR GIFTED
Take an interest in personal development! By opening up to yourself, you open up to others and you will offer yourself/them a bright life … I am so much happier in my relationship, in my family and in my personal life today than I was at 25. I am opening up to myself, to the world and its infinite range of possibilities.
.MY OPINION ABOUT THE IQ WAIS TEST
It is a tool that allows an overview and certainly not an end in itself. The tests are interesting when they are analysed by real specialists in giftedness. It is only an indicator against a norm. We are so much more than numbers at the bottom of a page… Hence the importance of having a real exhaustive assessment with a thorough reading.
.IS IT A WASTE NOT TO KNOW THAT YOU ARE GIFTED?
It all depends on how you feel in your life. For a balanced gifted person who is happy with life and “at ease”, I don’t think so. For the opposite, it’s such a liberating read! I remember a conversation with our youngest son about a specific Education Workshop for gifted children that I absolutely wanted to create. He didn’t understand why it was so important for me to have this space for these mothers. I told him that he lived his giftedness as normality in our family and quoted one of his friends for whom it was complicated and difficult. He replied: “Oh yes, Mum, now I understand why it’s so important for you! Go for it! “
.WHEN I MEET ANOTHER GIFTED PERSON, DO I RECOGNIZE HIM.HER? BY WHAT?
The way they look at me, the content of the conversation, the way they analyse a situation, their gestures too, it’s an intuition.
.WHAT DO GIFTED PEOPLE HAVE IN COMMON?
Being human beings, like others, with an almost immediate “mirror” effect, we recognise each other very quickly. In the same way as people who are passionate about any subject!
.THE CRUCIAL STEPS NOT TO BE MISSED IN A GIFTED PERSON’S JOURNEY?
First of all, give yourself time to absorb the information you receive, to anchor it well, otherwise, you will miss aspects (traumas) that will distort the journey.
Then learn to observe oneself, force oneself to slow down, to go deeper.
Then accept yourself as you really are, in all authenticity!
And evolve all your life, stay tuned 😉
.THE LAST THING I LEARNED ON THE SUBJECT (THAT I’D LIKE TO SHARE)
The different behaviours due to the typical differences between Gifted, Highly Gifted and Very Highly Gifted. A real revelation concerning one of our children! Thank you Fabrice Micheau for this wonderful gift!
.A WISH FOR THE FUTURE
To continue to live my life fully in an open, benevolent, respectful and curious way in order to shine even more. Not to have had a transparent life, to offer others my shared experiences to help them discover the world with other eyes.
.AN INTUITION ON THE TOPIC
I am on the right track thanks to personal development. For a few years now, my research has completely changed my behaviour, my interactions with others, my perception of events and I am giving more and more space to my intuition. By communicating about giftedness, I touch a lot of people and encourage them to question themselves.
.THE QUESTION THAT I WAS MISSING BUT THAT I WOULD LIKE TO ANSWER?
1/ Gifted and what else…? I discovered very recently that I have ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder), it has been really powerful and liberating. I realised that I had developed ways of coping with it and thus developed organisational skills. I now fully embrace it and it has become a subject of jokes with my husband and our children. No, I’m not deficient, I’m just like that and it’s fully OK 😉
2/ Your “mantra” sentence ? :
‘“Haut les coeurs! (“Hearts up! “)